A voice boomed over the PA, cutting through Borgata’s poker room white noise of riffling chips, table talk, and cocktail servers calling for beverages. “Perfect Poop Guy for $2/$4/$6/$12. Perfect Poop Guy, your seat is ready.”
When you spend enough time in poker rooms, you’ll see plenty of clever, and not so clever, nicknames for the waitlist. But during Borgata’s Fall Mini-Series, Perfect Poop Guy was all smiles as he finally got his seat in the Limit Hold’em game.
But it’s no joke. His poop saves lives.
Herbie Allen has perfect poop.
In fact, he’s the only person in the world over 70 years old who has perfect poop. He is the perfect donor for patients in need of fecal microbiota transplants.
“Doctors take my feces and they put it in dying children that cannot produce enzymes, antibodies, and other things to live,” Allen said. “These patients have no antibodies any longer. They take my feces, implant it through your intestines and they literally grow me inside of you. The next day you live — you live.”
Changing lives one movement at a time
Allen lives in Brigantine, NJ and is a retired executive casino host. Perhaps you’ve seen his billboard on the Atlantic City Expressway offering his help and advice.
He’s 76 years old and only discovered his perfect poop gift at the age of 71 when his wife got gravely sick. He had a routine colonoscopy and when he came to, he was surrounded by nurses.
“The doctor walked in and said, ‘I didn’t know I was going to be operating on a celebrity today,’” Allen said. “’You should see your photographs – they’re beautiful,’ All I wanted to do was leave!”
Allen’s doctors sent him to the University of Pennsylvania Hospital for screening and tests to see if he could be a fecal donor. He was the first person over 70 to be screened and the program tested him twice to be sure.
What makes Allen’s poop so perfect? It’s the perfect storm or routine, the will to be different, and a very strict diet.
The perfect food diet
“I only eat perfect foods,” he said. “I don’t eat red meat or sugar, I’ve never had a soda or beer in my life, never smoked or done drugs. I don’t eat anything past 6:00 pm.”
“Every day I start with a peeled apple,” said Allen. Never eat the skin of anything. I peel my tomatoes, everything I do with my food is mushy. I also never eat a hot meal or drink – never. I make everything easy on my stomach.”
Allen believes all food should be eaten at room temperature. He’ll also eat the same meal of salmon, broccoli, and spinach 40 days in a row.
“I’m going to be 76,” he said. “I don’t get sick. I don’t know what it’s like to have a cold."
Allen offers his help to those struggling with digestive problems, based on his lifetime of eating only perfect foods. He provides a blueprint of his diet and details it down to how fine he grinds his almonds.
What started him down his unique path? The urge to be different. Allen moved six different times as a kid and the final move came when he was a senior in high school.
Marching to the beat of his own drum
“It was another big school for me,” Allen said. “I thought I would never get noticed, so I did everything the opposite of everyone else. I wasn’t smart or talented, I just wanted to be different.”
“I made it my mission in life to be different,” he added. “These are my own preferences, not many people can eat the same meal 40 times in a row. It’s not a big deal anymore.”
But Allen plans to finally cut loose when he turns 77. “I want to try to smoke dope and try alcohol,” Allen said. “When I’m 77, I want a piece of candy, a soda and a beer. I do want to try some things I haven’t had in my life. I can’t do those things and still do what I do.”
So what’s this all worth for him? People in their 20s with the same perfect poop can earn $200,000 a year.
“When only the rich can afford it, that leaves the poor out and I can’t do that,” Allen said. “My mom raised me right. I take nothing.”
“If I start charging for this then only the worst people can afford it and I’m not going to do that,” he added. “That’s not me, that’s not me.”
All photos courtesy of 8131 Media - Trevor Scott
