Every year, high-stakes poker pros come knocking on my door.
And every year, they say the same thing: They're tired of feeling so anxious and unsettled, of being afraid of what others will think and afraid that they won't play their best and accomplish all their goals.
And they're tired of seeing how much all of that impacts their ability to just sit down, have fun, and play free.
They tell me they want to play fearless poker.
It’s such a nice phrase. It's extremely popular among the mindset coaching community.
It sounds so appealing — this idea that if you’re currently having problems at the table because you’re so nervous, or so agitated about a hand you just played, that there is some guided exercise or meditation or mental reframe they can give you that will make it go away.
Poof. Just like that, all your fear gone.
Stop fighting your emotions
If there was something that could do that, I would be all about it, but that’s just not how life works.
Humans have emotions, and you don't get to control them. When something big and painful happens? You don’t ever not hurt from it again.
Instead, over time, you learn to make space for those feelings and accept what's happened.
The same applies at the poker table.
What if you feel extremely nervous at the poker table?
The solution is not to make it go away (unless you’re willing to take some really strong drugs that will give you a whole new set of problems), but instead to learn how to stay present with all those feelings inside you, while still being able to feel somewhat okay, completely like yourself, and able to find some enjoyment and play freely while you’re feeling what you’re feeling.
No, it’s not the solution you had pictured. But it's the one that works.
If you’ve been chasing a magic idea that you will someday perform your best once you stop feeling how you feel, do yourself a favor and get on the program of learning how to stay present so you can play your best while you feel exactly how you feel.
For one, it’s actually possible. And two, you won’t have to wait for something that’s not coming.
Jason Su is the author of The Joy of Poker and coaches many of the world’s top poker players on how to perform their best when it matters most.
Learn more with Jason on YouTube and his newsletter, which you can get for free at pokerwithpresence.com.
